How to be a good parent

I read a great article in today's New York Times Health section that argues against conditional parenting (offering affection for good behavior and withholding affection for bad behavior) - When a Parent's 'I Love You' Means 'Do as I Say.' I love the philosophy of this piece, which is very similar to what they teach at Kennedy's school, and particularly this quote:

"unconditional acceptance by parents as well as teachers should be accompanied by "autonomy support": explaining reasons for requests, maximizing opportunities for the child to participate in making decisions, being encouraging without manipulating, and actively imagining how things look from the child's point of view. The last of these features is important with respect to unconditional parenting itself. Most of us would protest that of course we love our children without any strings attached. But what counts is how things look from the perspective of the children - whether they feel just as loved when they mess up or fall short."

Ha ha, take that Dr. Phil! Link to the full article by clicking on the title of this post. Having great kids, like our girls, helps to make the job easier, too!